Want More Satisfaction?
This week marks the anniversary of the largest game changing decision in my life. It is my son’s birthday. He turns 11. I could never have known what the choice to be a parent would mean for my life or profession. All the subsequent changes and decisions it would tee up for us. I know pretty much every parent can relate.
I am a single mom “by choice.” I had my son with an anonymous donor on my own. Making that crazy, brave decision, and then following through with all the actions required to make it so.
It was empowering. Life affirming. Scary as hell. Wow.
I look at my son now, and I am so proud of the both of us. Of our shared journey through tough and beautiful times. And, lots of ordinary moments that come from sharing your life with love. Those moments that build the fabric and foundation of lives well-lived.
So, I ask you today:
- Which of your choices make you proud?
- What ones do you wish you could “do over”?
- What choices are you consciously making or avoiding in your life now?
We all make so many choices every day. Most are not the big “game changers” like my decision to have a child. But over time, I can tell you a life lived without conscious choice or direction ends up grey and over before you know it.
Pay attention to your life every day, and the unconscious, auto-pilot decisions you may be making.
Why you choose what you choose makes a huge difference in the quality of your life. It all comes down to your perception. Do you feel as if you actually have a choice? Are you conscious of your daily choices and decisions? Even the small ones.
Unfortunately, most lawyers feel as if their cards are dealt, and they are stuck. They believe that their past choices dictate their current unhappy, unsatisfying path. In a recent Florida State Bar survey, 70% of lawyers would leave the law and their current position if they could. That’s right – 70% are stuck and miserable. One word comes to my mind with that statistic: pathetic.
There is nothing worse than feeling powerless over one’s life and career.
So stop feeling that way and do something about it. And, NO, I am not advocating that you quit your firm or the profession. Far from it.
I have found through my work that stepping back and rationally evaluating your current position, priorities and options helps immensely to bring back focus, clarity and, yes, even contentment. Accurately assessing and re-clarifying what you truly want for your life (i.e. your bedrock values and priorities), just that step, helps bring a sense of optimism and control back.
Try it. What do you have to lose? It is worth a few minutes of billable time. Trust me.
Take the time now to get your power back.
Own your choices and you will move into a more creative, innovative space.
It is about learning how to live mindfully. Present, aware and on purpose, even as a lawyer. Wake up from auto-pilot. Ask yourself what choices you are making. Write them down. Figure out what your real motivations are – be honest with yourself. What are your values and priorities? Write these down as well.
Are your choices in alignment with your values and priorities? Most likely some are and some will need some work. Begin with acknowledging what you are doing right to support yourself and work from there.
It amazes me how after careful evaluation many of my clients actually end up much happier in law without changing anything but their perspective. This understand then allows for future action plans. Tweaks or occasionally larger pivots become suddenly obvious and their goals easier to see. They are no longer stuck. Imagine how that feels!
Give yourself perspective and take back your choices. Improved satisfaction is sure to follow.
Needing some support to get moving? Let’s talk and see how I can help you move more quickly into clarity. Success is a team sport. You don’t have to do this alone.